Looking For The Balcony People

Beautiful photo isn't it?  Sometimes it is easy to look out across a beautiful view and inhale in all the positive "vibes" it provides.

Sometimes it is harder.  Many years ago when I was going through some really difficult times, Someone recommended a little book to me called,  "Balcony People" by Joyce Landorf Heatherly.  It was very enlightening and uplifting.  I still highly recommend it

We need to learn how to "disengage" from those people who are constantly pulling us down..down from the heights and into the basement.  "Balcony people" are the cheerleaders in your daily life.  They are the ones who are there, no matter what the circumstances, lifting us up and cheering us on and encouraging.

The recent suicide of Robins Williams hit me, and I am sure a lot of others, particularly hard.  It seemed he was a man who literally had "everything."  At least it seemed that way.  But all the time he was haunted by his own "demons."  He had money, fame, power and family.  He had an amazing way of bringing laughter and smiles to the whole world, and yet - inside where no one could see - he had great sorrow...unfathomable sorrow.  Why?  No one really knows.  Perhaps we are actually inhabited at times by "demons" - sneaky little devils who rob us of pleasure and joy.  No amount of pills or counseling seems to help some people.

But I think what distresses me even more, are those crappy (for lack of a better word) "Basement People" who are constantly trying to put others down and steal their joy.  What is it with some of these? Some are just bound and determined to inflict misery wherever they go.  Sometimes it is because they are absolutely miserable within their own skins and want the rest of the world to join them there.  In some cases, it seems these people actually enjoy trying to create "drama" and make others suffer from the wake!

Beware the Basement People! Run for your life!  Dump the "Negative Nellies" now!  Scratch them out of you address book and delete them from your Social Media.  Life is short people, and can be a joyous, tumultuous roller coaster ride.  There should be times of great joy and there will be times of great sorrow.    Look for those people who will accompany you on the ride! Looks for those who will stand by your side when time are fun and when times are rough.  No one needs someone else to drag them even lower when things are on the tough side.  No one needs this kind of "friend" or even "family."  Disengage from them...forget them and move on...family or not!  I truly do believe that unless you have experienced some sadness in your life, it will not be possible to experience the extreme joy that living can bring.  Sometimes it is through the tough times that we learn and grow the most.  Learn to embrace those times and move on.

If you are suffering from depression, then please please see a counselor or physician.  Sometimes there are true chemical causes for depression that can be ameliorated by medication.  But, sometimes it is just a matter of "refocusing" on life.  Sometimes it is a matter of getting rid of those "Basement People" and finding more "Balcony People."

Learn to look at life through the eyes of your "inner child" again.  Splash in the puddles on a rainy day (not when it is thundering however!), float around a pool, lake or ocean on a small inner tube,  look up at the clouds and see "people" and "animals."  Really take the time to look at the beauty around you.  Enjoy the laughter of babies and children.  Live, really live while you have the time!

PEACE, LOVE & JOY

Relationships

Today was our twentieth wedding anniversary, and we spent most of the day in beautiful Atlanta and Buckhead.  We did a lot of walking, shopping and eating!  It was 80 degrees and totally beautiful.

It hasn't always been easy, but we have managed to work through the good times and the bad times together and here we are.  Relationships take work.

I'm not just talking about marriage relationships either.  Relationships with family take work too, and sometimes in spite of a lot of hard work, counseling and your best efforts, things just don't work out the way you would like them to.  Don't beat yourself to death over it though.  The old statement "blood is thicker than water" only goes so far!

Just because someone is a blood relative doesn't mean they are a "safe" person to be around.  There are toxic members in a lot of families and you have to know when to let go and preserve your own sanity.  I have two sisters.  One of them is close and we share good times together.  The other I hadn't heard from in nearly eight years, and then out of the blue she "messaged" me yesterday.  I was tentatively hopeful it meant that things had changed with her and that we could perhaps have some kind of relationship.  Unfortunately, I was wrong.  She has not changed, and probably never will.  It made me terribly sad, but I am a very realistic person who had to learn the hard way that sometimes you have to protect yourself from dangerous people. 

Years ago, I read a cute little book called Balcony People.  It is about how we all need people in our corner who will stand on the balcony and root us on...their counterparts are "basement people" who try to pull you down at every opportunity.  You have to avoid those people at all cost.  It isn't always easy to know one from the other.  Sometimes it takes a friend to tell you, or a counselor.  But, believe me, you need to have those balcony people, and not those basement people in your life.

Today was a restful and fun day, and I managed to put aside the sadness which my "basement person" tried to visit upon me.  Each day is a bright, shiny new day, and needs to be treated as such. 

I pray for each of you lots of "balcony people" and the wisdom to discern the "basement people" and run from them into your bright, shiny future.

God Bless, Peace - Love - Joy